Tuesday, March 28, 2006
People describe the life of drinking lemonade as "boring," and sometimes fall off the cleanse out of sheer need to break the monotony. Yet I find so many fun things to do while cleansing, like observing the oddities of life on the Porcelain Throne. So before I continue: I want to call a moment of silence for the toilet paper rolls that are murdered in large numbers while cleansing. [ ]
It's amazing how little time passes before the lifeless little brown tub is hanging helplessly from the roll. One day, the roll is loaded with soft quilted goodness, and the next day it's just a shell of its former self. I wonder if the septic system would need an upgrade if everybody in my townhouse community cleansed at the same time.
I imagine how teams of preschoolers could have endless fun hours of toilet-roll-cardboard-thingy craft projects. Parents would squeal with glee as the next "I love you mommy" project was sent home.
Here's how Day 2 went yesterday: - I drank 53.8 ounces of lemonade (5 glasses) plus 20 ounces of fresh spring water
- It took my P.M. Senna tea exactly 7 hours to work, but this time, it "worked" for about an hour. I was up from 3am to 4am killing more toilet paper.
- The strange dull aches in both ears lasted all day long.
- I continued to have nagging pains in certain joints, but it subsided by evening
- I found myself watching cooking shows, excited about eating healthy foods after the cleanse. I didn't want food though, even when they pulled the fresh Italian pizza from the oven.
- Cooking dinner for my son was easy. He had an organic pizza with basil pesto and a whole wheat crust. I wasn't the least bit interested.
- I do still fantasize about my next opportunity to have chitlins, but the good thing is, I don't want them right now.
October 14, 2005
Today is a one-blog-post day. I have an event to attend tonight, and probably won't be around.
My left eye has been a little red for the past two days. Today it let me know why. It's running. Eeeew. My sinuses opend the Phlegm Factory today. Woulda rather missed that grand opening event. Seeing much more debris in the Porcelain Soup Bowl too. All of this indicates the next phase: The Mass Exodus From Mount Toxic Waste.
The ol' body is letting go of "stuff." My throat feels great, but it still sounds like Kermit took up residence. Skin splotch jumped-up onto my right cheek yesterday, and was gone from my face before I could get home. Had a slight "nervous" tremor in my hands last two nites around bedtime. Time for the ol' girl to part the red sea and let the toxins exodus outa Egypt.
Speaking of Exodus, I am feeling a little like Moses right now. Older. Wiser. Fresh off a mountain from receiving the 10 commandments. Well, except it was 10 lemons with some maple syrup.
I set aside some TV watching the past 2 days, and found I didn't really want to use that time. I've enjoyed the quiet evenings of playing with the boys and then reading after they go to bed. I insisted on seeing Everwood, tho. And our game of choice?? Donkey Konga 2 on Nintendo Gamecube. There's a lotta fun packed in that game!
My sons have developed a healthy curiosity about the lemonade and mom's new aversion to food. The oldest thinks it's way cool. The youngest just wants to taste the lemonade all the time. I'm thinking:
"You have a plate of homecooked goodness, and you want cleanse lemonade?" What a clown.
Still having very vivid dreams. The last one featured a cameo appearance by the same neighbor! I'm startin' to wonder.....
Notes for those on the cleanse:
1. Keep your lemonade with you at all times. Carry more than you think you need. If you get pulled away or have an extra errand to run, you don't want to get hungry.
2. Since my Senna tea was still working from the nite before, I skipped the SWF and had another cup of tea for breakfast. This is allowed, but I wouldn't make it a habit. Most accounts hail SWF as the primo was to move waste in the AM.
3. Be a living testimony and share with others. The response from those around me has been extremely positive. I guess they're thinking, "I'll try this now. Your fool-butt didn't keel over yet, so I guess it's okay."
More tomorrow...
Oh my Lord. I don't know what to say about feeling better OFF of solid food than I ever felt while EATING food.
I danced as I prepared a nice-sized dinner for my sons... and even invited mom over to have my plate. I treated them all to a bbq chicken dinner, with cornbread and asparagus. I even served on glass plates. As a single mom, my standard for at least a year+ has been paper and plastic.
By the time my mother got to the the house, she had a tentative look. I guess she figured I'd be drawn in the face and clawing at the walls for a chicken leg. I literally felt like I could run around my neighborhood.
I washed down my entire body with Dr. Bronners Castile Soap (Tea Tree variety). I noticed a "bruised" looking area on my left had that stung when submerged in water. That's my first skin blemish. I'm actually encouraged. That means I'm starting to eliminated through my skin. Yipee
The nite ended with Senna tea at 8:30pm... hoping to not have some "action" at 4am. Tomorrow is my first day back to work. I'd like to still be asleep at 4am.
As it turns out, I was up at 2:30am, 3am and 3:20am. Not bad.
I'm still feeling like the million-dollar-woman. Yes, a little bionic.
The hardest part of the day...:
...Not licking my finger when it was all stuck with bbq sauce and cornbread crumbs after serving the kids. Believe it or not, the thought only lingered for the few seconds before rinsing my hands. Piece of cake!
Another spell of tears...
...You know? Since the time I made the decision to accept Christ and live for the Lord, this cleanse is the biggest leap of faith I've made. As I watched Joyce Meyer talk this AM about "putting God first," I found myself "full" and thankful for the cleanse. There's nothing better in life than meeting a challenge that seemed impossible... especially when you chose the journey between you and the Lord.
I'm going to go ahead and admit this "out loud"... I'd really like to be one of the folks who stays on the cleanse for 40 days. I'm loving the freedom from food. Most folks know the Biblical story of how Jesus fasted in the wilderness for 40 days...
As many report, my vision is better. Strange to me, since I always test at 20/20. I don't get tired walking places, and I'm not as annoyed by the little glitches in daily life.
More tomorrow as the dancing continues. Rock on, sistah.
October 10, 2005
I ache like I’ve been exercising. I didn’t know that the Porcelain Squat was a contact sport.
Talk about contact sports, my son wanted Mickey D’s today. I’m not big on feeding that to the kids, but the idea sure beat fixing a fabulous home-cooked meal that I couldn’t eat. In rare form, he wanted to eat in the car tonight. Sitting in that confined space, the smell of cheeseburgers with extra onions and those oh-so-fried-right-salty-fries was something like a gourmet meal from the food channel. He had the nerve to smack as he ate. It seemed like I could hear every bite. I wanted to “contact” him at that point. I rolled my eyes, asked for an end to the smacking, and sipped my lemonade.
Oh Lord, I’m fantasizing again. I can’t wait to go to Whole Foods, get some good beef, organic toppings, and whole grain organic buns. I’ll show him cheeseburger with extra onions. Hmm… I wonder what day after breaking the cleanse I can have a burger?
I drive home as he smacks on the fries. I almost ask for one just so I can lick it and throw it out the window. Lick it? What kinda junkie is that??? LOL
Mom calls because she wants me and the boys over for a big fish feast on Friday. Oh no. She remembers the cleanse. When was the last time you had to turn down a dinner invite? “I’m sorry, I must decline. I still won’t be eating solid food by next weekend.” Just saying the words made my body want to rebel. “Down, girl!” (Where’s my whip).
I end the night with the last of the 60 ozs of lemonade. I’m pleased that it’s actually difficult to drink all 10 glasses each day.
Tomorrow is D Day. Day 3. The Big Kahuna. As I finish writing this, the volcano rumbles in the belly of Kahuna Island.
More tomorrow.
Notes for those doing the cleanse:
1. A furbie started growing in my mouth today. My tongue has a white film that looks like a small stuffed animal. The same film is creeping onto my teeth, although brushing gets rid of it. You couldn’t sandblast the stuff off the tongue, though.
2. Many say the Senna tea works overnight. I take mine around 10pm. The first time, I was up at 4:30am or so. Last night, I was up twice between 2am and 3:30am. In spite of getting up in the middle of the night, I am sleeping better than usual in between.
