Day 1: All's Well that Ends Well

Wednesday, August 2, 2006

Yesterday was Day 1, and all ended well. I was slightly amused about the twitch that developed under my right eye - especially since I didn't feel an ounce of stress.

Until now, I actually enjoyed cooking for the family and watching cooking shows while cleansing. In a surprise turn of events, yesterday I disliked the act of preparing the boys' dinner and was annoyed by TV commercials featuring food. I don't now what gives, but I hope the condition is temporary.

Cleanse Stats for Day 1:

Lemonade: ~64 ounces
Pure Water: ~34 ounces
AM: No Senna or SWF, PM: Senna Tea
Trips to the Bathroom: Lost count hehe
Number of Food Thoughts: What food thoughts? Are you talking about that bacon cheeseburger that was dancing in my head?
Number of Days Left: 9

Free Advice for Newbies:

When you're cleansing, there is no such thing as gas. Flatulence isn't your friend. If you feel the need to toot, realize that it's a conspiracy. Don't find a quiet corner and give in to the feeling. Go to the bathroom. You'll be surprised that the feeling wasn't air at all.

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Day 1: A Test of My Will

Tuesday, August 1, 2006

Last night was the most interesting cleanse prep I've ever experienced. It was like a conspiracy to derail my decision to start today.

I had a refrigerated item in my car that needed to get home fairly quickly. I decided to purchase my lemons from a convenience store to save time.

Not a SINGLE location had lemons. My son went in and out of each place, and not a lemon in sight. Yes, we found other produce. But who bought all the dang lemons?

Already sensitive about starting the cleanse, I got angry and frustrated - which is unusual for me. My son saw my reaction and suggested that I postpone the cleanse. I explained that it wasn't an option, and he wanted to know why.

"Because I promised several members of the group that I would start tomorrow, and I don't intend to let them down. [Pause] Even more importantly, I promised myself and I really need to do this."

I was forced to make a huge gas-guzzling loop back to the supermarket.

Once this loop was over, the time was approaching 7pm. I hadn't seen home for almost 12 hours. I grabbed fast food for dinner near my home. With relief, I hit the gas and imagined how it would feel to walk through the door and kick off my shoes. Home was only down the street. Then I realized that I left my pocketbook IN THE SELF-SERVE CHECKOUT LINE IN THE SUPERMARKET.

Half of my life was in that pocketbook. Numbers. Bank account information. Computer files on a USB key. I had a flash of what a criminal mind might be able to achieve with the contents of my bag.

I grabbed my cell phone and called the store. Miracle #1: My cell phone wasn't in the pocketbook. Miracle #2: The pocketbook was exactly where I left it. The woman on the other end of the line was astonished - and I was relieved.

As I made the turn away from home for gas-guzzling loop #2, I was more than angry. I could spit fire. My jaw was clenched shut. If hell's fire went out at that moment, I'm pretty sure Satan would have called for a quick light. What else could go wrong?

By the time I neared the supermarket, my simmer was down. I had a conversation with myself all the way there, reminding myself of the hidden blessings - which can be found in ANY situation.

"Thank God I learned about the cleanse, and have enough money to buy the ingredients. Thank God for tests that try our patience and build character. And thank God my pocketbook is exactly where I left it."

The moment I stepped from the car to retrieve my bag, the entire day changed. As I entered the door, and older woman gasped and exclaimed, "You look beautiful!" I was floored. It was unexpected, and my attention was in a totally different place. I thanked her with a huge smile that literally melted onto my face. She broke the ice. My ice.

As I walked by her, a neighbor was standing there asking about my son and thanking me for inviting her children to his party. As I approached the desk, the woman complimented my bag and wanted to know where I got it. And on the way out of the store, another woman complimented, "Your dress is very pretty."

A string of negative events ran right into a string of unexpected kind words from strangers.

I didn't bother preparing the lemonade mix last night. The night ended late for me. I couldn't help but wonder what the next day would hold.

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Cleanse 2, Day 1: Dodging Cheese Biscuits

Sunday, January 1, 2006

Here was the fun part of the day: Sitting in Red Lobster watching my 13-year old son eat dinner. We always eat out for dinner after church. And just like clockwork, he wanted to know: Where are we gonna eat this time?

“We?????” [not the sweet kind...but the kind with an attitude]

“Oh. Yeah. Right. Where am I gonna eat today?” [not noticing the fire in my eyes]

After recovering from the urge to drop him out of the car and speed off, I realized he was right. As a single mom with two boys, I’m outa luck for cleansing buddies in the house. My routine should be the only one that changes.

The Red Lobster host and the waiter both stared at my lemonade mix. I was clearly breaking the rule “No Outside Food.” I must have looked insane enough for them to resist approaching me about the subject. I felt like Queen of the Hill as I sniffed cheddar biscuits and happily passed.

The start of the day was a little shaky. I didn’t have the senna tea the night before, because I only one tea bag that I was trying to save. Yikes.

My body got right to work. I certainly gave PLENTY of reason. I ate holiday-style until the last possible minute. I’m talking Jamaican Curry Chicken and Rice at around 1am, and a fried chicken leg after 2am – all after a New Year’s night service.

The day in summary: Mild headaches. Plenty of elimination. The “heavy body” detox feeling. And one big grin for finally starting.

• Quick Stats:

Glasses of Lemonade: 6 (barely.. still forcing it down after 11pm)
Ounces of Water (additional): None
AM: Senna Tea, PM: Senna Tea
Healing Crisis: None
Weight Loss: None
Wildcard Stat: I think I broke a bathroom record for Cleanse Day 1.

• Flashback:

Wanna see where I was on Day 1 of my first cleanse?

Cleanse Day 1: I've Got Issues

October 9, 2005

Day 1 was quite a day. I hit some "spots" that others report later in the cleanse. I'll share:

I had several headaches. BUT, as promised, each went away with a trip to the porcelain throne. You should have seen me, on a Sunday morning, running from my usher post at church every few moments.

I developed a pain in my left hip, my left side, a wrist, and my neck. I hear this is evidence, that the cleanse is working out some stuff.

I skipped the Salt Water Flush in the AM since I had a 9am meeting and didn't know how my body would react. I went with the Senna herbal tea.

I went bowling during the evening, and there was my hussie friend at the concession stand. Unfortunately, I had to take my 13-year old son to meet her. It was quite an experience, for the first time, pretending she wasn't there. It was harder than I hoped, but easier than I expected. Good Lord, had food been a part of EVERY good, bad, and ugly event in my life?? Dang, I've got issues.

The worst part was the evening. Usually, it would be snack night. Holiday. No work. Stay up late with the kids. Ouch.

So I went to my room late in the evening, and found myself crying. Oh Lord. I'm not hungry (as the cleansing guidelines promised), so what's the problem???

In those few moments alone, every way that I'd mistreated myself with crappy food flashed by. It was like some sorta moment-of-clarity, where God answered my prayers to reveal anything that's holding me back. He's true to His word, and had a conversation with me right there.

When I finally dried-out and stopped looking like a drama queen, I drank my Senna tea and went to bed.