An Enemy Masquerading as a Friend

Did you ever discover that someone you liked secretly despised you?

You see... I developed a close relationship to a former friend very much like that. This friend, dating back to childhood, was steadfast and committed to our relationship. Not a single event in my life -- good or bad -- went by without the love, support, and comfort of my friend. We became especially close when my parents separated when I was 17. The deal was sealed when this friend moved in after my own divorce at the age of 32. We were tighter than ever.

Now, at 34, I'm rethinking the relationship. Darnit if that friend isn’t the food that has me wrapped in a warm hug called excess body fat. Worse than the fat, I’m a walking toxic zone.
How I escaped being a 300 lb. freak show amazes me. Heck… how I escaped a diseased life triggered by those toxins is another miracle. It’s true that “God sits high and looks low.” If it wasn’t for good genes, I’d be one of those big mamas in a Richard Simmons exercise video.

I'm committing to 10 days on The Master Cleanse. I want to go 20 days because this cleanse is really a fond farewell to that hussie old friend of mine.
For those of you who aren't familiar, The Master Cleanse is a 10-, 20-, 30- or even 40-day commitment to drink a "lemonade" mix (with no solid food) to totally de-toxify the body. A Google® search on The Master Cleanse reveals a sea of personal testimonies of people whose lives were changed after detoxification.

I’ll chronicle my food-free days on this blog, and talk about the humorous side of surviving the journey.